Starship, It's Not Over

There are some projects in which you feel things seem to be going OK but at some point encounter certain problems where your intuition gets little glimpses of how everything could go wrong very fast. 

This project in particular started over a simple idea: Let's change something in my country. Ever since my college thesis project, I always wanted to make a real change in a community, to give a voice to the women that had none in my country. 

It all seemed fine, students were working, and the solutions they arrived at, were quite impressive. As long as it was on our side, things were fine. Sure, sometimes slow, sometimes not as enthusiastic but we were doing our committed part.

Prototyping finally came two weeks ago. It was as hard as expected, I felt as if I were in a three ring circus. On one stage the artisans, on the other, the students trying to teach a dyeing workshop. Then the arrival of cameras and the radio reality show but forget about all these, the center stage was taken by the people who organized the artisans.

They had a bit of a personal drama going on. Apparently, their political party leaders had found about the project they were developing with us and because the women didn't share that piece of information with them, one of them was about to be banned from the party. This woman, the head coordinator of the organization, looked worried with a cell phone on her hand as the word spread fast amongst everyone.

All things considered, we had two solid days where students broke some of their personal barriers, I believe they truly empathized with these women and as they were about to leave, all of them talked about the delivery dates for the prototypes with the artisans. May I ask you to remember that prototyping is all measuring times and establishing costs? This will be useful later in the story. Driving to Mexico that night, we all felt sweaty and covered in dust but I guess happy. I personally felt as if just one more show was left for us, and I could easily start to loosen my grip over this project.

But lurking in the shadows, something I could call, the Phantom of the Conqueror, was cackling by the moonlight.

A week later in Mexico City, we started organizing the students to pick up the prototypes that were ready. I asked students to make a list, because nobody in Saucito had made one on behalf of the organizers. We patiently waited from Wednesday till Friday for these women to show up and have confirmation of the deliveries, the place and time of the meeting, but as time went by, we were growing anxious that nobody was giving us directions. At 3 pm last Friday afternoon, we decided to cancel the trip.

I was frustrated. Some students were stressed out because their projects would not be ready as they require further processes that only start with the embroidery process. A few needed to go there on Saturday so I got into Facebook because we use that platform to post for immediate needs to students online and there, in plain sight, the organizers of the artisans were tagged on a picture. All smiles and cozy within the "political party" fraternal lines. On an event. In Mexico City. Wait, what?

Everything made sense. Nobody was answering and if they scarcely did, they seemed to be buying time because they had no answers, they were proselytizing. I felt blood beat faster all over my body. Soooo I tagged both of them and the other teacher I work with: "Look [teacher's name], "X" and "Y" were here in Mexico, you guys should have let us know!"

A dirty trick, I know, but suddenly texts appeared on our cell phones, cordial as hell. Yes, yes, we're here! Whatever you need! One last personal message only on mine: "BTW, that event in Facebook you tagged us on, wasn't today". I kept looking at the image and took some screenshots at it. More lies.

I closed my eyes for a bit. If I remember well, just at the beginning of this project, there was a point where I saw both these women more interested in taking pictures of themselves with people from the radio show at the press conference and for a moment I thought, this could become a problem.

Fast forward and there it was again: thirst of power in politics or fame are usually not aligned with compassion. These are actions guided by self-interests, where there's mostly talk and hardly ever work.

We finally managed for one student to leave for Saucito on Saturday only to be received by 15 or more angered artisans, not to mention the head organizer that insulted our student because he didn't bring more money towards artisans that didn't deliver not even half of what they promised. She told him in front of the artisans: "Of course! This is what happens to us because we are so gullible! Because we're working with rich kids! The work you are asking for is appalling! You are exploiting these women just as any other initiative that comes here! The delivery times are absurd! some of them went to work to some other place this week! And while all the women said this was impossible, your mean students told them to work faster!"

Remember that small bit of information about prototypes? This is where it comes handy. Students left most of the women with more than enough materials for the projects, they bought them tools and gave them as gifts, but most important, watched with awe, how fast and skillful the artisans worked. Thing is, either the artisans decided that if it took longer they would get paid more money the next week or that the head organizer didn't do her job coordinating their work, but they were all mad, pointing fingers at this single student who had no other interest than being fair and decent with them.

I still can't believe the weakest link on this project are women who are patronizing towards the artisans, thinking these talented indigenous women "belong" to them. Deciding who they talk to or not, believing they are protecting them from "rich college kids" or from being exploited by the insensitive outsiders. These organizers are the same people that wear pins against violence towards women on their jackets and post it on their Facebook profiles?

What happened next and the final outcome this week is no longer important (for now). What I'm really sad about is that the women from the organization are deciding the future of the handcraft tradition in the small municipality of El Saucito, in Tolimán. They are deluded by the fact they are helping the artisans when in reality, they are keeping them two steps behind, always in the dark, feeding the ungrateful certainty of a paternalist evil that they know and believe, they can't live without. I wish everyone could listen to this woman's rationale, it explains so much why things remain the same in my country. 

Didn't this woman get the memo? Indigenous people are not owned by anyone. They are not ignorant, they have their values and customs. And sometimes, as much as you want to honor and respect those traditions, they have also become a demanding bunch when these and other groups come to work with them. They ask for things to be supplied with as if it were an obligation from those who come looking for their skills. Their sense of urgency and hunger has blinded them from longer goals and if they decide they are not working for a few days, they think they are entitled to more money. Here's where good coordination translates the message and ultimate goal of the project: "These students are working for us, together with us, investing their money, and actually, will leave with no prize on their hands but with their hearts fulfilled. The prize is ours, why should we mistrust them?"

The Phantom of the Conqueror came gushing in and washed away the sand castle we were building so carefully.

Inversely, I think now, it is the crude reality of my country that has changed me. I no longer believe people necessarily want to work more than they do, or that they want to be empowered or that they are subjugated by vile people that hold their ignorance captive. Yes, education plays an important role, for sure. But if I had to focus on two main issues, (from all the areas that intervene in this wicked problem and I'm sure I'm completely ignorant in these anthropological matters), I would pick: power and prejudice.

Deep sigh.

This doesn't mean I'm giving up, there is so much work ahead. Probably more compromising until it really gets to be over.